Naked Man Comedy Series, Episode Two
The Naked Man Comedy Series. In a world full of danger, a hero arrives. But why is he naked?
Naked Man, Episode Two: Naked In Public (or) Win Some, Lose Some, I Guess.
Produced by Christian Monzon and Adam Fike.
Written and Directed by Adam Fike.
Director Of Photography, Mark Ryan.
EXT. OFFICE BUILDING – DAY Firefighters rush in and out of the building.
A TELEVISION REPORTER clutches a microphone in front of a news camera. A crowd forms to watch. There is a HOTDOG VENDOR on the corner.
TELEVISION REPORTER: We’re told the fire is out and a man is leading the trapped elevator riders to safety. Here they come now. Excuse me. Anyone. Who was the hero in there?
The FIRE CHIEF offers Naked Man a blanket. Naked Man politely declines and steps confidently toward to the News Camera.
TELEVISION REPORTER: Sir, um, what happened in there? And why is it you’re . . .
NAKED MAN: These brave people kept calm heads and remained in a neat, single file line. They are the heroes today.
TELEVISION REPORTER: Great. But why are you . . .
A SMOKE VICTIM emerges from the building and collapses.
NAKED MAN: Sir? Are you alright? Stand back, everyone! I know what I’m doing! Please do not attempt this without the proper certification.
Naked Man applies CPR. The Smoke Victim coughs to life.
SMOKE VICTIM: Thanks,
NAKED MAN: Don’t thank me. Thank Peter Safar and James Elam, the brave men who developed mouth-to- mouth resuscitation in 1956. The United States military adopted the procedure one year later.
TELEVISION REPORTER: That’s great. Now about your . . .
Behind the Reporter a WIFE hands her HUSBAND her wedding ring. She turns away with tears in her eyes.
HUSBAND: Honey, wait. Please! Give me one last chance! Naked Man hears this and turns knowingly toward the couple.
WIFE: I can’t live this way. Not anymore.
HUSBAND: But . . . NAKED MAN: Kids, I couldn’t help but overhear. If you don’t mind . . . He walks over and takes the ring out of the Husband’s hand.
NAKED MAN: You know, I’ll tell ya, I’ve been a lot of places. Seen a lot of things. And you ask me? Two people feel strong enough for one of them to buy one of these . . . Must mean they’ve got something just super worth fighting for. What do you say, champ?
The Husband takes the ring.
HUSBAND: Don’t worry. I’ll have Jacobs fire his secretary in the morning.
WIFE: Secretary? I was talking about you getting along with my mother.
HUSBAND: Your mother? Not likely. The Wife slaps her Husband and stomps off.
NAKED MAN: Well. Win some, lose some, I guess. Naked Man turns back to the Crowd. He faces a wall of speechless faces.
NAKED MAN: Folks, I know there’s something you’re all wondering. So here it is. You see . . .
GUNSHOT. The Naked Man falls. The crowd GASPS.
TELEVISION REPORTER: Someone shot the naked man!
CROWD MEMBER #1: But what was he going to say?
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